Calamitatis
by Redlin Vermilion
Summary: "Onee-chan, even if our status as sister is gone, the blood that runs in our vein still the same." My first SakiTeru fic. And also the first ever in this place as well as in english.


Finally, after lacking too much sleep all those days, wanting to make a story in this fandom, I finally manage it!

And I don't know how it turned out, because english is not my forte nor my mother language (I even suck at my own mother language).

Well, just enjoy it, I guess...? (I'm really bad at this, am I?)

Disclaimer: I do not own Saki, nor anything connected to it, it belongs to their respective owner. which in this case, Kobayashi Ritz...?

* * *

Finally... After years of struggling...

Years of being hurt, being alone, and being thrown away...

I've finally got my chance, the chance that I was yearning for those years, the chance to persuade my sister to reunite and become family once more.

And this time, I will make sure not to waste this chance that I've tried so hard to get and make sure to bring my sister and mother home.

* * *

**Calamitatis  
**

* * *

After the final match of the mahjong tournament, I'm walking aimlessly in the hallway trying my best not to get lost while searching the waiting room of my sister school. I just hoped that my sister doesn't get angry at me because I beat her school, and thus making my chance to persuade her vaporized.

Before the match, I already told my teammates that after the match ended, win or lose, I'm going to see my sister, alone. Of course they didn't like the idea of "leaving me alone" when it comes to search the other party place, but I manage to convince them that it'll be alright and if any case I did get lost, I'll inform them. And luckily, I arrived at my sister's school waiting room without getting lost.

Just when I'm going to knock it, the door suddenly flung open and make me freeze on the spot. Realized there's someone at the door, the person stopped for a second, trying to recognize the person which in this case would be me.

"Teru," she said, "your sister is here."

The blue-haired girl who opened the door inform her pink-haired teammates who still inside the room. The girl then look at the person whose her teammates' talking about and just walked towards the door.

"Could you all please leave us alone?"

Said the pink-haired girl in a cold tone, and I still freeze in my spot, but this time it's not because of the person who open the door, but because hearing the voice of the pink-haired girl which is my sister, Teru.

Without any complains nor comment from her teammates, they just leave like Teru says and give us some times alone in front of Shiraitodai's school waiting room.

"What is it, Saki?"

Now, Teru looked at me whose still freeze in spot. I know I should answer her question, if I really want to bring her back. Yet, I can't make myself to produce any words nor sound. After a long silence, I've finally gathered up the courage, and speak out what my reason to meet her here.

"I want to talk to you, _Onee-chan._"

"About what?"

At that abrupt response, I flinched a little and makes all the courage I gather up just now flying towards the unknown. But now is not the time to get scared, after gathering up the courage again, I continue.

"Please, can't you and mother came back to Nagano? Can we get back together, as family once more? Will you go back with me, _Onee-chan_?"

Just when I stated my intention for coming to her school's waiting room, she just look at me, after a really long silence between us, she sighed and then speak up.

"Saki, do you know the reason why I don't want to recognize you as my sister?"

Hearing that question, the question that I really want to know the answer, or rather that question should be mine to ask to you, _Onee-chan_. But of course I can't just answer it like that, thinking about it carefully, there's only one reason why she doesn't want to recognize me as her sister.

"Because you hate me...?"

I answered it with a shaky tone, yes that's the only possible reason why she doesn't want to recognize me as her sister. Because she hates me, I'm just a burden to her, just an useless person to her.

After the answer I give, she just look at me, but this time not with that cold stare she always wears, this time she looks at me as if she was about to cry.

"_Onee-chan_...?"

I asked her with a worried tone while narrowing the distance between us so if any chance she really is going to cry, I can hug her right at that moment.

"Of course that's not the reason, dummy" this time her eyes were glittering, "it's because... I love you..."

Right after saying that, the tears that she's trying to held just falling down like a rain, a heavy rain.

I know, I just said that if she cry I will hug her, but after hearing her answer I can't get myself to hug her let alone to move an inch.

After all this time, I thought that she hates me, she despise me, because I'm so annoying, because I'm just a burden for her and that's why she came to hate me and doesn't want to recognize me as her sister, never will she recognize me again, nor even thinking that I ever existed at all.

But, it's just my pessimistic side taking over me again. Just the negativity taking over my head. All this time, the sister that I loved turns out to have the same feelings. Not just a mere sisterly love, but the love ones have for another human being, a romantic love.

Of course I should be happy right?

It turns out my feeling is not one-sided after all, it's mutual. And my sister just want us to be together forever, not as sisters but as two person who fall in love with each other.

But then, after hearing that my sister actually loves me and my stomach filled with butterflies, a sharp pain, I feel a sharp pain in my heart. So suddenly that makes me wants to cry at that moment, but I'm doing my best not to, and proceed to answer my sister after a long wait.

"I'm sorry, _Onee-chan_... but... I can't..."

This time, it's my turn having a heavy rain in my face, the tears that I'd try to hold back just now rushed out like a flood. While looking down, unwillingly to look into my sister face, I let the tears falls as they please.

"*gasp* Why, Saki?! Why you can't?! You too love me right?! Or do you have someone already?! Answer me, Saki! Tell my why you can't!"

Shocked with my answer, my sister now trying to make me look at her face while shaking me, but I held this position because I'm too scared to look at her face now, because I'm not aswering with the truth.

"_Onee-chan,_ even if our status as sister is gone, the blood that runs in our vein still the same."

And it's me now, who using cold, harsh words to my beloved sister. The truth is I want to, no, I'd love to accept her feelings and reasoning, to be with her not as sisters, together with her forever.

"And that's just the reminder for us, all we can have in this life is as far as any sisters in the whole world would, only as a sisters, nothing more."

Yet I continued it, still using the harsh and cold tones while looking down and crying. I continue hurting my sisters feeling.

The reason I don't want to accept her is that I'm scared. I'm scared to what would happen to us in the future, and the separation that will come to us in the end, no matter what perspective you look at it, sisters, no, two person with the same gender to be fall in love, at the end they will face the painful truth, the society wouldn't accept it and will force them to be separated from each other.

"But it's different with us! It will be different! I'll make sure that we will always be happy together, we will always together forever Saki!"

My sister still trying hard to convince me while in tears, yet here I am running away just because I'm just a child that scared to the unknown future that might be fall upon us.

"I'm sorry _Onee-chan_... I'm sorry... I just... scared..."

"Then I'll protect you! I will always protect you! I will protect the both of us! Please just don't give up on me!"

Now, her tears is just as heavy as a storm, and I too, still crying hearing that words I yearn for a long time, but I can't accept it, just because I'm not brave enough, I don't have the courage to do so, I'm still scared, to think after this I have to be separated with my sister again.

"...I'm sorry... I can't... it's enough to be sisters... more than that... I just can't take the pain if we're separated again... I'm sorry _Onee-chan_, I'm really sorry..."

"..."

Hearing that answer, she then know it is time to give up, and I too know, that the chance to get my sister back home with me already gone. With that, she wipe her tears from her face, and then left me all alone in front of the waiting room without saying anything. After she left me, the strength that keeps me standing disappear thus making me falls with the tears still flowing in my face which is rushing more than it was before.

Once again, I failed to bring back my sister back, and there's no more chance for me to persuade her.  
Now, we will be truly separated, never will be reunited again.

* * *

I know!

This is my favorite pairing, yet I write angst story with them, my brain is trying to kill me here! *mad*

Just because I haven't get enough sleep for the past week, makes my brain only thinking angstangstangstangst *cry*

So, how it turn out?  
I'm fairly new here, so I will accept anything, I mean anything, flame, critics, correction, or whatever it is!  
It's all for the better tomorrow, and to help my poor skills in writing stories!

So... If you would, please... review? :D


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